Sarcastic Management Tips from Your Staff

The following are things we sometimes do that can frustrate your staff. See if any of these things pertain to you, then avoid them when possible.

• Never give me extra sidework at the beginning of my shift. Always wait until close and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.

• If it's really "on the fly", interrupt me every two minutes to inquire how it's going. That helps a lot.

• Always leave the kitchen/dining room without telling anyone where you're going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.

• If my arms are full of pre-bussed dishes, don't open the door for me. I need to learn how to function as a paraplegic and this is good training.

• If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which is the priority. Let me guess.

• Do your best to keep me late. I love this restaurant and really have nowhere to go or anything to do.

• Never keep the supplies I need to do my job readily available. I love a good game of hide-and-seek in the middle of a rush.

• If the job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. Leaks like that could cost me a promotion.

• If you don't like my work, tell everyone but me. I like my name to be popular in conversation.

• If you have special instructions for a project, don't write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done.

• Never introduce me to the people you're with. When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.

• Be nice to me only when the job I'm doing for you could really change your life.

• Tell me all your little problems. Nobody else has any and it's nice to know someone is less fortunate.

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Written by Brian Bruce . If you'd like to submit other annoying things we do as restaurant managers, email them to me at admin@RestaurantManagerRescue.com and they may be added to this list. If your submission is accepted you will receive full credit.